From the Onion...

Crack Dealer Only Tenant Landlord Can Depend On For Rent

So it must be true.

Willie Nelson Busted For Being Stuffed With Drugs

Yeah, he's a big threat. I feel ever so much safer with Willie behind bars, don't you? Your tax dollars paid for this, by the way.

Benedict the Brave
The pope said things Muslims need to hear about faith and reason.

A well-considered article about the Pope's kerfuffle. I'm not sure if it's necessary, I think the people who rioted had no clue what the Pope actually said, wouldn't understand it if they did, and can't read. They're a bunch of morons that are a perpetual lynch mob, proving the Pope (and the Emperor he was quoting) absolutely right. They're the Vogons of the religious world.